Capturing the anxious, self-aware mood of young college grads in the aughts, Private Citizens embraces the contradictions of our new century: call it a loving satire. A gleefully rude comedy of manners. Middlemarch for Millennials. The novel’s four whip-smart narrators–idealistic Cory, Internet-lurking Will, awkward Henrik, and vicious Linda–are torn between fixing the world and cannibalizing it. In boisterous prose that ricochets between humor and pain, the four estranged friends stagger through the Bay Area’s maze of tech startups, protestors, gentrifiers, karaoke bars, house parties, and cultish self-help seminars, washing up in each other’s lives once again.

San Francisco, 1952. Detective Evander “Andy” Mills has started a new life for himself as a private detective—but his business hasn’t exactly taken off. It turns out that word spreads fast when you have a bad reputation, and no one in the queer community trusts him enough to ask an ex-cop for help.

When James, an old flame from the war who had mysteriously disappeared, arrives in his offices above the Ruby, Andy wants to kick him out. But the job seems to be a simple case of blackmail, and Andy’s debts are piling up. He agrees to investigate, despite everything it stirs up.

The case will take him back to the shadowy, closeted world of the Navy, and then out into the gay bars of the city, where the past rises up to meet him, like the swell of the ocean under a warship. Missing people, violent strangers, and scandalous photos that could destroy lives are a whirlpool around him, and Andy better make sense of it all before someone pulls him under for good.

Dear Reader,
It has come to my attention that smoking kills, along with police, loner white boys, and looks. While embroiled in the process of trying to live, I have written this honors thesis [1]. It [2] is dedicated to the first years who haven’t yet died from alcohol poisoning, exhaustion, or overdosing. This work has been a labor of love and of hate. In it, you will find juxtaposition, verisimilitude, French, Freud, and anything else I’ve wasted 60K a year to learn.
I would like to thank my advisors: Mr. White Supremacy, Mr. Capitalism, Ms. Racism, and, of course, my Life Partner [3] for all the guidance they have provided during this process.
Set in the mind of a young Black woman who is losing it, The Unfortunates is a darkly funny debut about the realities of elitist institutions from an exceptional new writer.
[1] Ma lettre d’adieu.
[2] When writing an honors thesis, you can get away with vague antecedents.
[3] My depression